viernes, 23 de febrero de 2007

Real 1: Dos panteras negras sueltas en Ezeiza


"Alerta por panteras negras que pasean por Ezeiza.
La gendarmería buscaba hoy a estos felinos que se comen su basura. Los ejemplares habrían escapado de un zoológico ya cerrado, que funcionaba en las cercanías y no tenía jaulas.
Fueron vistas merodeando en la localidad de Ezeiza, mientras los vecinos se mostraron asustados ante la presencia de estos felinos que se comen su basura. C. Santa María, un vecino del barrio privado "La Celia", zona residencial donde habitan unas cincuenta familias, denunció que las dos panteras andan sueltas cerca del Centro Atómico de Ezeiza, ante la Dirección de Fauna de la provincia de Buenos Aires. Los ejemplares habrían escapado de un zoológico ya cerrado, que funcionaba en las cercanías y que presumía de amplios espacios y de no tener ni rejas ni jaulas. "Tenían el tamaño de un perro grande: una estaba dentro del contenedor de la basura y la otra, comiendo de una bolsa de plástico", informó Carlos Hurego, jefe de mantenimiento del Centro Atómico, donde se divisaron las panteras. "Como el barrio privado no tiene servicio de recolección de basura, los residuos se acumulan en un contenedor en la entrada hasta que se los lleva la municipalidad", explicó Santa María. El Centro Atómico se encuentra en un terreno que es monte y estos felinos negros no se habían dejado ver hasta ahora, aunque "ver ciervos, bambis y zorros no es nada raro", recordó Santa María. Desde la aparición de las dos panteras, una colonia de vacaciones está planteando suspender el día de camping que tienen previsto a final de mes cerca del Centro Atómico".
Mortal. Salir a pasear con tu hijo y tu mujer. Llevarlos a los montes detrás de Ezeiza y de pronto notar que hay una horrible planta nuclear. Subir nuevamente al coche, dar una excusa convincente para un niño de cinco años y parar una legua más adelante. Volver a cargar los bártulos del picnic, llevar al nene de la mano con la pelota siempre unos tres metros adelante y de repente sentir una especie de ladrido detrás de los eucaliptus. Que "deben ser perros querida, de éstos perros cimarrones que andan por ahí". Tranquiliza lo improbable de un sólo ladrido en medio de una jauría y que el sandwich de tomate y jamón crudo esté tan bueno. Después de unas revolcadas en un improvisado arco, papá se cansa y entonces llegan las preguntas. "¿Cómo se llama ése árbol, papi?" "Se llama araucaria". "Y ése perro-negro-grande que esta arriba del auto?"

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Q. dijo...

Panteras atómicas.
Panteras negras y de ojos rojos
encendidos
de la localidad de Ezeiza
Panteras cada una,
Abismal,
Intrusa en picnic,
Preparada para dar el gran salto;
Negra,
Radioactiva,
Sanguinolenta,
Putrefacta,
Arruinadora
De la buena tarde;
Pantera sexual,
Hermafrodita,
Pantera perversa,
Vejadora de niño y niña
Pantera voraz
Que se cuela en los equipajes
De los inquilinos
Que se despegan en aviones
De la localidad atómica

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Pantera sexual, dice Q... Rodrigo Rey Rosa cuenta, en "Ningún lugar sagrado", de un video que vio en Nueva York: una mujer madura y voluptuosa, en un cuarto, con una pantera macho, a la que le han cortado todas las uñas y le han sacado los dientes. Hay, dice, penentraciones evidentes, en primer plano. De todas las historias de zoofilia que he leído - no tantas...- me parece la más excitante.

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